Alcohol Recovery Story by Judy P.
Hi, My name is Judy and I am a happy to be sober recovering alcoholic.
I am the youngest of six children, My father was
an alcoholic, My mother was
not.
I was born in Chicago Illinois in 1964 and
at that time we rented a small apartment in a
house with a decent sized back yard. The owner lived in the
basement. It had 2 1/2 bedrooms,
front room, dining room,
and a kitchen, all
rooms were small. My grandmother also lived with us until her death in 1975.
My father was always incapable of making a good living and my mother
could not go back to work until I was old enough
to be left alone in the house for periods of time
as all children. I came to find out later we where known
as white trash, why? We
where never filthy we always bathed after play time. But
we never had decent clothes shoes, and food in the
house. And there where so many of us in that
little house.
We never could go on field trips at school
or to birthday parties because there was no money for fees or gifts.
We never went out on family trips My father used to come home drunk
and abusive, and I
remember a few fights.
The day came the landlady was to old and was selling the house and we
had so we had to move. We
moved into a bigger apartment in a new neighborhood. Wow,
we had more room but still barely any food,
or clothing we were always mocked by other
kids.
Mom was working by that time and Dad had a stroke and
was half paralyzed so
what ever money that was coming in was from mom's
small paycheck and dad's VA
check which he was pretty much selfish with.
The fights continued, my 2 older sisters had
married and moved out, my mother finally had enough of the
old man and kicked him out to which we all where relieved, however
there was even less to go around. I remember
eating popcorn as dinner and learned to
make a loaf of bread from flour as a meal. for myself and siblings. And one
Chicago winter all I had to wear was a crochet poncho, and one white
pair of jeans and holes in a pair of shoes. But
growing up I did have fun playing with friends and
my siblings in the back yard and running around the
neighborhood with a lot of other kids. So
it wasn't all bad at that time.
By the time dad moved out I was 13 yrs old and did not have a lot of
self confidence to begin with, as I said I was the
youngest so I was naturally picked on a lot,
left out a lot, and was very shy. I
was doing okay in school at the time
and graduated grade school and went on to high
school that's where my true troubles began.
I started hanging out with my sister and her friends, they drank, I
hung
around people who smoked pot, I smoked a little
pot never liked the high so I
did not get hooked thankfully, however I do remember my first drink.
I was at my sisters best friends house with
her, my sister and my best friend, and we played a
drinking game, with those 16 oz old style cans, it
was called kernel puff. I remember the odd name of
the game but how it was played I don't remember
except that when you polished off the can you had
to turn it upside down.
We had taken the bus back home and it was
winter time and there
was a lot of snow on the ground and we where
singing and having a good time. After that my
drinking memories are fast and blurred, what I do remember is
that I was always the one who got the drunkest and always panicked
and had to ask what I did the night before, I
always drank the most. I do not remember a lot of
hangovers at that time though funny I must of had them
quite a bit. I do remember one hangover where this boy came over and
brought a bottle of southern comfort I remember
taking a couple of sips then nothing, this girl
that was living with us at the time said I threw up all
over my self and they had to put me in bed. Never dated that person
again!
I ended up dating this one boy who turned out to be very abusive,
this
lasted from time I was 16 on and off (years even) till I was 26 where he had
locked me in his basement with him and wouldn't let me leave and I
had 2 black eyes. I think back now
and remember that I stayed with him because he supported my
drinking habit and bought me food and some clothes
from time to time. Of all things
I couldn't get on my own in the beginning but later in my twenties he
did for me.
He did not care how drunk I was,
so he was a crutch. Sick as it was.. but from 21
on I had various room mates where I'd go
out and party same things happened,
I got the drunkest, and
blackouts.
When I was 28 I finally started trying to
turn myself around , however my mother had gotten sick with cancer
and I had gotten a apartment by myself near to
where she was, and then it was bad to worse when
she died, I still miss her however I used her death I
think as an excuse to drink
even more heavy then ever before, this lasted
for many years.
I started losing jobs, I had gotten into a bad accident,
got a dui and lost my apartment, that was a
turning point. I did not stay
completely sober until 2000 where I had almost 3 years
and then went out for a week
I have been sober ever since. It
was a battle to get that time in, thru several treatment centers and it
is getting easier now instead of harder.
I have learned to make friends in AA,
I make those calls and
most important I make those meetings! I have a
wonderful husband and 2 beautiful children today where I never
thought I would . I thank god and I thank
AA for this.. keep coming back it does work,
but it does take a lot of effort and a lot
of time.
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